EPISODE #281

How to Build True Accountability Part 2

You're listening to the school leadership reimagined podcast episode 281. 

Hey Builders, before we begin, I have a quick question for you. Are we connected on social media? The reason I'm asking is because as much as I love giving you the podcast episode every single week, I'd love to take our relationship deeper. So if we're not connected on social media, let's connect. I'm on LinkedIn at Robyn underscore MindSteps. I'm on Twitter at Robyn underscore MindSteps. I'm on Facebook at Robyn Jackson. Please, let's connect. So we can keep the conversation going. Now on with the show.

You're listening to the School Leadership Reimagined podcast episode 281. How do builders like us make a dramatic difference in the lives of our students in spite of all the obstacles we face? How do you keep your vision for your school from being held hostage by resistant teachers, uncooperative parents, ridiculous district policies, or lack of time, money, or resources? If you're facing those challenges right now, here's where you'll find the answers, strategies, and actionable tips you need to overcome any obstacle you face. You don't have to wait to make a difference in the lives of the people you serve. You can turn your school into a success story right now with the people and resources you already have. Let's get started.

Hey builders, welcome to another episode of the School Leadership Reimagined podcast. 

I'm your host, Robyn Jackson. And today is part two of a series that I started last time about how to build accountable agreements and how to help people remain accountable to those agreements. So last time I walked through the steps to building an accountable agreement.

And it's really important because it's not in order. You're not telling people to do things. What you're doing is you and the other person are agreeing upon a set of success criteria, a process, and you're helping them be accountable to a particular outcome.

Okay? So that's last time. If you didn't listen to that, go back and listen to episode 280. You can go to schoolleadershipreimagined.com slash episode 280.

I know that's a mouthful, but go back and listen to that episode. And those of you in BU, by now the resource is in the BU Vault. You can look for it there.

It's how to make accountable agreements. This time, I want to talk about the very rare instances where people violate those agreements. It does happen.

I mean, the world is not perfect. In most cases, when you make the right accountable agreement, you don't have to worry about people violating it. They are accountable because of how you set things up.

But there are rare cases where people do violate those agreements. And I've tried a couple of different things. I mean, you know, I'm old school.

So back in the day, I used to write people up. And I was good at that. I mean, the whole thing, and I'd write them up.

Probably wrote people up a little too much in my zeal for my leadership training to make sure that I held people accountable. It doesn't work. It creates a lot of frustration.

It creates a lot of resentment. At best, you may get compliance, but you don't get people being accountable. And forever afterwards, you have to run around and hold them accountable.

You check to make sure they're getting it done with the threat of losing their job or hanging over their heads. And I don't know about you, but that's not why I became an educator, to run around and threatening people and holding them accountable. I became an educator because I wanted to make a difference.

And if I'm running around doing that, am I making a difference, right? Because if they're only complying because I'm standing there, what on earth is happening in that classroom when I'm not there? So am I making a difference? No. Am I helping that person become better at the work? No. Am I aligning with our vision, mission, and core values? No.

So we have to find a better way to not just run around holding people accountable, but to build that accountability in our staff. I always operate from the mindset that people want to do the right thing. Maybe that's naive.

I don't know, but it makes my life easier, right? 

Because when you do that and you assume the best of people, then you're not walking around looking over your shoulder every two seconds, worried about who's going to betray you next. And you bring out the best in people when you do that, if you look for the best in them. So today's episode is not about how you're going to write people up.

Look, I'm not getting into that. Instead, today's episode is about how you repair the breach. And we're going to use a strategy that I learned a few years ago from a book, and I'll put the link to the book on the show notes, but it's all about the how to help repair the breach when someone has broken an agreement and get back to that agreement.

And it's the CPR method. And so C stands for context, pattern, and relationships, context, pattern, and relationships. So we're going to talk about each of those pieces in turn and how you can use it.

The first time someone breaks an accountable agreement, you have an agreement, you've met and talked about it, they've agreed to do it, you've got a plan in place, and then you find out they're not doing it. The first time you're going to talk to them about the specific context, the specific incident. So let's say that we've agreed that you are going to build standards aligned lesson plans and unit plans.

And I come into your classroom, and you're not teaching a standard. You're completely all standard. And so I sit down, I give you some feedback, but then I bring up, listen, we agreed that you would be doing creating standards aligned, that all of your lessons would be standards aligned.

And when I observed this lesson, it's not, so now I want to know what happened. I want to talk about the specific agreement. Why was it not standard? Did you, you know, I'm trying to find out, did you think it was standard aligned? And that, you know, so it was just a misconception.

We have two different ideas of what the standards aligned lesson is. Did you go off standard? Did you not write a lesson plan that day? Like what's happening? And I'm only talking about that specific incident. And my goal is to try to get us back to the agreement.

That's all I'm worried about. I'm not trying to look, you know, like, you know, I'm not questioning their professionalism. I'm not, you know, I'm not impugning their character.

I'm simply trying to get us back to the agreement. Same thing is true if we have an agreement about, you know, being in school before school so that we're ready for kids when they come to school. And I have somebody who then comes late and it wasn't an emergency.

They're just like sliding in late. And so at that point, I just want to talk about that specific incident. I'm not going to talk about, Hey, you know, like we, you know, I'm not going to let it go for two or three incidents either.

I'm just going to talk about that specific incident and make sure that we are still in agreement on the things that we agreed upon. Okay. If we have an agreement about turning grades in on time and they don't get their grades in, I'm going to talk about that specific incident.

I'm trying to understand the context. I'm trying to figure out, is this an isolated incident? But most importantly, I'm just trying to get us back to the agreement. Okay.

So this is not chasing, checking and correcting. This is not holding people accountable. This is simply coming to somebody and saying, Hey, we had an agreement, but I see some behavior that is not, is outside of our agreement.

Are we still okay? Do we need to get, you know, is, is this a, was this, this a, you know, a blip in the matrix or is there a problem with the agreement? And if so, we need to renegotiate the agreement. If not, I'm just encouraging you to get back to the agreement. It's real simple.

Don't get emotional about it. 

It's one time. But when you do this on that one time, you re, you help people see that the agree, that they do have responsibility for an agreement.

It also helps you build a stronger agreement because if there's something in agreement that's no longer working and it's created a crack, you can repair the crack in the agreement before things get egregious. Okay. So C, context.

The first time just deal with the incident, get back to the agreement, move on with your life. Okay. The second time that they break after that, so they, if you've done that and then there's another incident after that, well, now you're going to talk to them not about that incident as if it's an isolated incident.

You're going to talk about a pattern that's emerging. So the conversation looks a little bit like this now. We've talked about this before and initially I thought it was an isolated incident, but it's happened again.

And now I'm worried that a pattern is developing. Okay. So now you're going to go back to the agreement and you're going to talk and get them to talk, frankly, about what's happening.

And you're saying, I don't want this to be a pattern. So what do we need to do with the agreement that we have to ensure that this doesn't become a pattern? Okay. Go back to the agreement.

Make sure that all the pieces are there. Get the recommitment and then get equipped them with what they need to do the thing that they originally agreed to do and then move on with your life. All right.

Now, again, you're taking note because it is a pattern, so you're being a little bit more vigilant. You're watching it. You may need to put some things in the agreement to help monitor it so that it doesn't happen again.

You're still not holding them accountable. They have to be accountable. So you're putting it back on the agreement.

This is the agreement we had. I'm noticing a pattern. I'm worried that things are becoming a pattern.

Is there something about the agreement that is no longer working for you? And hear them out and let's figure it out and come to a new agreement. So in context, you're getting back to the old agreement. But if there's a pattern, you might need to talk about making some tweaks to the agreement because it's clear the agreement is not working.

Okay. Now, context. First time. Second time. Talk about the pattern, CP. Third time.
If it happens a third time, now we've got a bigger problem. And it's a problem not around the agreement itself. It's a problem around the relationship.

So this is not, this is no longer an issue. 

We've had two agreements and both times you've broken them.

Now we have a problem with a relationship. Let's talk about it. What's the real issue here? What's going on? This is when stuff comes out like, well, I just feel like you bully me or I don't feel supported.

I don't know. You know, there's a, there's stuff that comes out after that. We have a whole script inside of BU that helps you to kind of navigate this conversation safely.

And it's called Steps to Holding a Boundary. And again, it comes from a mentor of mine, Annie Hyman Pratt. So those of you who are in BU, just look for the resource Steps to Holding a Boundary.

But that can help you manage that conversation. But at that point, you are now sitting there and you're saying, here's what I'm observing. Here's what I've seen.

Here's what I've heard. It's no longer a pattern. There is a deeper problem.

We've gone through and had conversations about the agreement on multiple occasions. I'm still seeing this behavior. I'm still hearing this from you.

And so now we have a bigger problem. Let's talk about it. There's something that's broken in the relationship we have.

And my positive intention for this conversation is to repair that relationship so that we can work together, so that we can be productive, and so that we can stay anchored in our vision, mission, and core values. Hey, it's Robyn here. Real quick, I just want to interrupt this episode for just a second because if you are enjoying what you're hearing, then would you mind sharing this episode with somebody else? So all you need to do is just go to your phone, if you're listening to it on your phone or your podcast player, and then click the three dots next to this episode, and it'll give you the option to share the episode.

Now, if you do that, three things are going to happen. 

First, the person that you shared with is going to think you're a hero, especially if they're struggling with what we're talking about right now. They're going to love you.

Secondly, you're going to feel good because you're going to get the word out about Buildership and start building this Buildership Nation. And third, you will get my eternal gratitude because I really want to get this out to the world, and you'd be helping me out. You'd be doing me a huge favor.

So please share this episode with someone right now who's dealing with this same issue, someone you think would really benefit. And now, back to the show. And when you anchor in that, when you anchor in the vision, mission, and core values, it's less about I don't like you and you don't like me, and it's more about the relationship we have working towards the bigger goal that we're all embracing.

And because you've done core values like a Builder, it becomes a very straightforward conversation because they stood up in front of you and everybody else on the staff, and they said, these core values are non-negotiable, just like everybody else did. And so now you can talk about not only the relationship they have with you, but the relationship they have with their staff, and the relationship they have with the vision, mission, and core values. I'll give you an example.

We were in office hours the other day, and someone was talking about a teacher who had repeatedly violated one of the agreements they had as a staff. And the principal went to the teacher and said, so I'm seeing this happening. This is what I'm seeing.

This is what I'm hearing. This is my positive intention for this conversation. And then she said, this is a violation of our core values and talked about how.

So either you need to change your behavior so that it comes back in alignment with what we say is non-negotiable, or it is no longer non-negotiable, which means we need to change the core values. Which one do you think you need to do in this situation? You put it back on them. If they say, I'm going to change my behavior, done.

If they say, I don't think that's non-negotiable anymore, then you say, okay, let's go back to the staff. Well, we'll go take it to the staff because that's a non-negotiable. If it's not non-negotiable for you, it's not non-negotiable for any of us.

So we need to change the core value. And so again, you're not responsible. You're just putting forth the obvious choice and it's up to them to take ownership.

Now you go back to the staff. 

Now you're not throwing them under the bus. You're not going back and saying that Sally here doesn't like this core value and keeps violating the core value.

What you do is you go back to the staff and say, listen, we have a core value that we said was non-negotiable, but there's some things that are happening in the building that tell me it's not non-negotiable. You can give generic examples and you can say, so we need to renegotiate that core value because it's not non-negotiable. And then you leave it to the staff to discuss.

You leave it to the staff to raise the issue. And then you go through and do that airline question again. You know, everybody has to say they agree and they now hold that non-negotiable.

And so what it does is it keeps the staff accountable to each other. So sometimes when you're talking about the relationship, you're not just talking about the relationship between you and the other person. You're talking about the relationship they have with our colleagues because you're all working together to work for your vision, your mission, and your core values.

And so at the point where they've violated the agreement now for the third time, it is a bigger issue and without freaking out and, you know, you know, writing them up and doing all that. I mean, maybe you have to write them up legally, but the point is not the writeup. The point is how do we repair the relationship, the relationship they have with you, the relationship they have with their colleagues, the relationship they have with the vision, mission, and core values.

That's the work that we need to do. Now some of you are thinking right now, look, I don't have time for that. These are adults.

We pay them a salary and benefits. They need to just go ahead and do their jobs. But that's a leadership approach.

That's really a boss approach. Because if you are building a culture and building a school that is moving towards a vision, mission, and core values that has some import, you have to recognize that you are dealing with human beings. Human beings come with different issues, different challenges, and your job is to keep everybody focused on that vision, mission, and core values.

Let me tell you what will take people's attention off your vision, mission, and core values real quick, writing them up without any context, chasing, checking, and correcting them, going after teachers. Instead of focusing on your vision, mission, and core values, you're focusing on getting rid of this teacher. Instead of focusing on your vision, mission, and core values, that teacher is focusing on fighting you to hold on to a job they may not even want.

That is not going to get you to your vision. So as a builder, what you need to do is even in how you handle difficult people or difficult situations, it should always align with and move you forward to your vision, mission, and core values. You have a choice.

You can spend months going after teachers and have done it.

It's awful. It is stressful.

It hurts your culture. Half the time you don't win and the teacher is still there next year and now you look silly because you spent all that time going after a teacher and you didn't get rid of them and now they are even more emboldened to do everything that they were doing before and more and other people are watching and saying, you don't mean what you say because you can't even get rid of somebody who's not doing their jobs. Or if you do get rid of them, then you've ripped apart your culture.

That doesn't work either way. What a builder does is a builder always builds. So if somebody violates an agreement, what you're doing is you are using that to rebuild You're building that person.

You're rebuilding the trust. You're rebuilding the community. You are strengthening your culture so that it never is a setback.

Even if it's frustrating, you don't have to go backwards. You can keep building and it all has to do with, first of all, how you create the agreements in the first place. Because if you do that, you nip a lot of this in the bud because it just never becomes an issue.

But when somebody violates an agreement rather than reacting and going back to, well, I've tried being a builder. Sometimes you just got to be a boss, which I've heard people say, you don't ever have to be a boss. You don't ever have to be a leader.

You're always a builder. So you can't abandon buildership the moment you get frustrated by a person because they are not doing what you want them to do. You're always a builder, which means that you address people who violate agreements like a builder.

And what builders do is they build. So you address people who violate agreements by using it as a way to build a better agreement. That's the first time.

The context. You go to that person. It could be just a one-time thing.

You don't know. You address the context the first time and you build that person back up to make sure that they're able to honor the agreement that you have in place. The second time they violate it, you look at the pattern, you learn from the pattern, and you build a better, stronger agreement that's even more impervious to being violated.

And if for some reason they still violate that agreement for the third time, then you have to go back and realize that the relationship wasn't what you thought it was. And you have to build a better relationship, a better relationship with you, a better relationship with your colleagues, their colleagues, and a better relationship with your vision, mission, and core values, CPR.

If you do that, you never stop building.

And so it doesn't feel like a setback or something that's sidelining you from your work. It is the work because you are building. And as you do that, as you continue to build the people around you, and as you help people stay accountable to the agreements that you're making, you're continuing to make steady progress towards your vision, your mission, and your core values.

And that's how you continue to hold and build agreements to help people stay responsible and accountable, and to build their capacity for accountability with how you're running around chasing and checking and correcting and holding people accountable and not being able to focus on the work that you really want to do. Like a builder. I'll talk to you next time.

Hey, if you're ready to get started being a builder right away, then I want to invite you to join us at Buildership University. It's our exclusive online community for builders just like you, where you'll be able to get the exact training that you need to turn your school into a success story right now with the people and resources you already have. Inside, you'll find our best online courses, live trainings with me, tons of resources, templates and exemplars, and monthly live office hours with me where you can ask me anything and get my help on whatever challenge you're facing right now.

If you're tired of hitting obstacle after obstacle, and you're sick of tiny little incremental gains each year, if you're ready to make a dramatic difference in your school right now, then you need to join Buildership University. Just go to buildershipuniversity.com and get started writing your school success story today. Hey, it's Robyn here, and I want to thank you for listening to today's episode.

Now, if you have a question about today's episode, or you just want to keep the conversation going, did you know that we had a school leadership reimagined Facebook group? All you need to do is go to Facebook, join the school leadership reimagined Facebook group. Now, there are going to be a couple of questions that we ask at the beginning because we want to protect this group and make sure that we don't have any trolls come in and that it really is for people who are principals, assistant principals, district administrators. Make sure you answer those questions or you won't get in, but then we can keep the conversation going.

Plus, we do a lot of great bonus content. I'm in there every single weekday, so if you have a question or comment about the episode, let's continue the conversation. Join us at the school leadership reimagined Facebook group, and I'll talk to you next time.

Thank you for listening to the School Leadership Reimagined podcast for show notes and free downloads visit https://schoolleadershipreimagined.com/

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